I thought of dying. I thought that was the end it.
Several months ago, I started to lose interest on everything.
I easily get upset, I felt so insecure, I get headaches almost everyday. Migraine is my constant buddy but the pain was much much worse.
I don’t cry too often, I am just sad. I felt so low and it’s like havingan empty space on my chest every morning. I tend to worry about almost everything. I got bad memory and my brain was always foggy.
I would skip work when I don’t feel well. I’d just take painkillers then go back to bed. I sometimes overwork and drain myself so I don’t feel anything other than tiredness and fatigue. I took alcohol more often than usual.
I sleep early, wake up late and rely on espresso and dark, iced coffee. I was caffeine dependent.
Please do not get me wrong, I have a decent support system. My family never misses a day and sends me message constantly. My best friend always checks on me. Good Morning and Goodnight texts never failed to reach my inbox, then she calls to hear me cry but say nothing. It feels like unloading just to free up a space for another batch of dread.
My partner has always been amazing. Calls every time to let me rant and cool down. Encouraged me…
